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Dear Ms. Joan,

I am constantly having my peace and quiet disturbed by cell phones ringing and phone conversations so loud I hear every word of other people's conversations whether I want to or not. This even happens in fine restaurants when I'm trying to have a romantic dinner with my wife. HELP!

--D.P., Clovis

Dear D.P.,

Etiquette is still playing catch up to this part of our technical world. This particular problem has been addressed.

When entering an area where cell phones ringing and conversation on cell phones would disturb the peace and enjoyment of others, turn off the ringer. If your cell phone vibrates, you will know you have a call. Let the phone take a message. Call them back later.

It is disrespectful to the friends you are with when you answer a cell phone call. They will feel that the person on the other end of the phone line is more important to you than they are.

You should do all you can to make your friends or host feel they are the most important people in the world at that moment. The only reason to answer a cell phone would be if you're waiting for an organ transplant and the hospital is calling.

Dear Ms. Joan,

I frequently luncheon with the same friends most Saturdays. It bothers me that one of our group monopolizes the conversation every time we get together. What can I do? How do I tell her?

--F.R., Clovis

Dear F.R.,

Hopefully she will read this answer to your question.

Pointing out bad etiquette to an etiquette violator is also bad etiquette. When this is done it embarrasses your friend, and you don't want to do that.

The respectful way for a group of friends to have a conversation is to take turns talking. This is easily accomplished by not speaking again till everyone else has spoken once. Keep up this pattern and everyone will have their chance to speak and make this an enjoyable conversation for everyone at the table.

Dear Ms. Joan,

My boyfriend doesn't open the car door for me or hold the door open for me or let me walk in front of him to a table at a restaurant. Isn't this rude of him? What is the proper etiquette in this situation?

--M.N., Clovis

Dear M.N.,

Women have been demanding equality with men for a long time. Unfortunately we have had to give up some things along the way. Most women are capable of opening their own doors. It is not required any longer that men open the door for a lady, but it is one of those older rules of etiquette that make life a bit more beautiful.

Tell your boyfriend how much it would mean to you if he would open your door and how jealous your girlfriends will be when he does. (They will be green with envy.)

When he does a courteous act for you, be sure to thank him. That is always required.

Etiquette dictates that it's ladies before gentlemen. The only exception to this rule is when passing through a crowded room. In this case the gentleman walks in front, clearing a safe path for the lady.

Dear Ms. Joan,

When introducing my boss to a friend do I introduce him as my boss?

--R.G., Clovis

Dear R.G.,

You do not use work titles in introductions. You would say, "This is John Smith. We work together." Then you would say, "This is Paul Jones, my best friend." There are other examples I could use, but this is the easiest to remember and works in most situations. Insert your own names, of course. Your friend will learn Mr. Smith is your boss in conversation.

If you tell everything you know in an introduction, it leaves nothing to lead into a conversation.

After being introduced it is still proper to say, "How do you do."

Joan Wynn of Clovis is a certified etiquette consultant. Her column publishes the last Friday of the month in The Clovis Independent. E-mail questions to askmsjoan@clovisindependent.com or send to Ask Ms. Joan, The Clovis Independent, 420 Bullard Ave., Suite 105, Clovis 93612.